Job Search Pink Suit Series #1: Ditch the Pitch?

The hidden job market isn’t really all that hidden. Networking (on line and off line) opens the door wide to all those jobs you wouldn’t hear about otherwise. It opened that door for my last 4 jobs. Will an elevator speech help?
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Get Even. Make rejection pay off big time

Job search can be one place where we get more rejection than in any other place in our life. (For me, match.com was the only place that came close!)

But there are two ways to have something positive come out of this awful thing called “We’ve decided not to move forward with you as a candidate.”

First, if the recruiter calls to give you the bad news, it’s a great time to get some job search assistance. If they can share with you what the reason is they have decided you’re not their candidate, you will be able to make some changes to make the next interview better.

As a recruiter, I know nearly everyone wants to avoid hearing any critique of their interview. But maybe you should know. It’s a little like the “spinach in your teeth” situation. Embarassing but better to know now.

I had a fabulous candidate who was not moved forward after her interview for a VP position because she gave an impression that she was not up for challenge. Nothing could be further from the truth, but the way she explained her job transitions seemed to demonstrate a pattern of leaving when things got tough.

Hard to change things if you don’t know they are happening.

It’s going to be hepful for you to know about the spinach here, so ask for feedback. Promise the recruiter you aren’t planning to try to argue about the decision or convince them they are wrong. The time to do that is long gone.

Your second opportunity is to do some networking with the hiring manager. The one who didn’t want you! If you built any amount of rapport during the interview (and you did, right?) call. Assure them you aren’t trying to talk them out of their decision. Ask them for advice on what they think you should do next in your search. What would they do if they were in your shoes.

You never know when you might get some fabulous advice. And now you have a networking relationship with the hiring manager.

Lots of good things can come out of rejection if you will just take these unusual steps. Of course, you won’t want to do this if you and that spinach have formed a close relationship.

It was heartbreaking. My great candidate blew his interview.

I was recently conducting a search for an executive for a large well known company. After one of my candidates was interviewed, I was eager to hear what I thought would be my client’s thumbs up feedback. I was stunned to hear that while he looked fabulous on paper, he had totally blown it in his interview with her.

What happened?

My client was very put off by the sound of desperation she picked up from the candidate. She said he seemed more desperate to have a job—and frankly any job–than excited about the position itself. Doing a job search can be tough, and it’s hard to be “up” when the mortgage is due—again.

Trying to cover up being discouraged, desperate or whatever word describes how you might be feeling doesn’t work. Your feeling creeps out in words, energy level and even the subliminal cues that constitute such a large part of how the listener perceives our message.

How to turn that feeling of desperation around without trying to lie to yourself.

What can you do to change your mood/energy/mindset? Here’s one simple exercise that can really help. It may seem too simplistic to be useful, but you’ll know in just a couple of minutes if it can help you turn your attitude around. So please just go with me for a minute.

I want you to write down all the things you can think of that are positive about your current situation.

Is this just doing affirmations?

I don’t want you to try to tell yourself that everything is rosy and you sure wish you had been out of a job much earlier! Those statements are similar to affirmations. I don’t know about you, but they never really worked for me. It seemed I was saying things that, while I wanted them to be true, they weren’t. That actually made me feel worse.

So instead, please start identifying some of the good things you have experienced since you started your job search.

Examples of positive things that came out of job search

Here are some I’ve heard while doing this with my coaching clients:

• I’ve gotten to spend more time with my 4 year old son. It’s amazing what that has done for our relationship and I wouldn’t have had that if I were working.

• I’ve met some really great people, and I’m astounded they are so willing to assist me. I’ve made some real friends I’ll have for a long time.

• I’ve had a chance to think about what I really want to do in my next position, and think seriously about what is important to me for the first time in a long time.

• I’ve gotten a lot more savvy about networking—online and offline—and those new skills will help me in my next professional role.

• I’ve stepped outside my comfort zone—a lot. I’m seeing that I actually can do things even when they seem scary and “not like me.”

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If you spend just a little time each day thinking of what is positive, you will be able to focus more positively. You will then start to have a more positive attitude. That conveys a sense confidence and enthusiasm for the position—all of which is attractive to hiring managers.

Feeling better will make a difference. I know it might sound a little airy fairy, but just give it a try. Let me know what happens.

Job Search Networking Meetings: when do you pull the plug?

Here's a job search networking question I get a lot: "Can I stop going to all those 'networking' meetings for job seekers? Aside from the fact I don’t know how to do an elevator pitch, and that’s usually part of the routine, I am spending a lot of time in these meetings and usually leave depressed."

I can relate to this question! When I started networking the first time I was looking for a job, I thought it was going to be pretty easy. After all, there were all these networking meeting and that must be how I would get a job. Otherwise why would they have them?

Of course I quickly figured out I probably wasn’t going to meet someone who could hire me at those meetings—everyone was looking for a job themselves. And any job openings that were mentioned, well, veryone else was hearing about them at the same time I was!

Then I thought maybe the value was the good job search advice I would get. There was some of that, but eventually I realized that, at least for me, there wasn’t enough value in the networking meetings full of other job seekers for me to justify my time investment.

Plus I have to admit that I usually felt pretty bad when I left those meetings. Everyone else seemed so “together” and to be doing so much in their search—much more than I was. Of course maybe they were glossing things up a little—I certainly wasn’t being totally honest about how difficult my search was! Plus seeing all those people who might end up being my competitors for a position didn’t do much to lift my spirits either.

When I cut the tie to many of the networking meetings I was attending, it was scary. Every other job seeker I knew was attending several of these kinds of meetings. What was I going to do instead? Was I going to be left behind?

So I decided that I would go to meetings where I would meet the kinds of people with whom I would like to have an ongoing relationship, meetings where I would meet people in a position to hire me, or meetings that would be fun. And that’s how I formed my current network of fabulous people with whose help I got my last four jobs—jobs that weren’t even being advertised and one of which the hiring manager had given up even looking for someone.

It’s easy to think these hours are well spent, but be honest with yourself about: how you feel about the meeting, the value you get from each meeting, how much your job search is accelerated by attending. So it can be scary to stop doing something everyone else seems to be doing. Maybe focus on different meetings for a while and see what happens. You can always go back to a job seeker meeting if you feel the urge.

What do resolutions about dieting and job search networking have in common?

You can use the same rationale to avoid doing both of them!

We’re at that magical time of the year when all changes seem possible. I hope you’re making a resolution to do a lot of networking this year, even if you already have a job. It’s the secret door into the hidden job market and you never know when you might find something perfect for you. Read more